A Critical Key to Raising Godly Kids who Don't Drift Away

I've been asked a number of times lately for advice from younger moms on raising kids who don't grow up and drift from the faith.    There is not one magical key to ensuring that this won't happen.
There are some very important key principles for sure; I'll list a few:

• Teach them about Jesus
• Teach them to pray
• Make sure they understand the Gospel... not just as a ticket from hell, but as the Good News that it is....that we have been ransomed/set free from sin and we are no longer slaves to sin or the consequences of it. When a person grasps the depth of their sin and realizes that God has declared them "Not Guilty" they will want to serve and please Him.
• Show them that Christianity is not a set of rules and that legalism is not Christianity.  Christianity is being a Christ follower....a follower of the King of Kings... a privilege and an honor to serve Him.
• That sin separates us from God....whether the sin of pride or disobedience to parents that "good Christian kids" are guilty of, or the sin of adultery, drugs, murder.   Our sins are not "better' than "those people's" sins.  We are all separated from God by our sin and we all desperately need a Savior...that is Jesus!  
• Teach them to love others....your neighbors, the downcast,  the "good" kids and the "bad" kids.  We are all the same---we need Jesus.  
• Model Christianity to your kids. All. The. Time.  Jesus should permeate our lives especially at home. When we mess up, confess and repent.  Show them grace, and love, because Jesus does that to us. 
• Talk about Jesus and the Word of God often....not just once or twice a week but let it be a central part of your lives.  Speak the Word.  Sing praises.  Write verses in your house for all to see and think about.  Read the Bible. Those words are life and truth and are what will get us through the hard times.  

All of the above are great.  They are imperative, necessary for raising kids who love God. But, lately I'm seeing kids who have been raised in a good, godly environment still drift from the faith. I'm seeing a common thread in these sad situations, so I want to warn you.

1 Corinthians 15:33 "Do not be deceived; bad company corrupts good morals." 

Proverbs 13:20 "Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm." 

    

I'm seeing parents that are lax in who they allow their children to be close friends with.  I'm not speaking of keeping our kids apart from everyone that isn't a goody two shoes pastor's kid or missionary kid (and the PK's and MK's everywhere roll their eyes).  I'm not saying your kids can't have casual friends that are not passionate for Jesus. I'm not saying they can't play baseball or soccer.  What I'm warning is that who your children choose as their closest, most intimate friends are who they will become like.   I guarantee you!    If their closest friends have bad attitudes, are disrespectful to their parents, want to spend all their time gaming, don't view Jesus as the best thing that's ever happened to them, love to pursue worldly pleasures, listen to music that sings about things God hates and watches movies that esteem sin, they WILL become like their friends.

Just this month, I've talked to two different Christian homeschooling moms whose kids have drifted into the world because their closest friends do not encourage them in their faith to pursue Jesus with all. 
Homeschooling is not the answer folks.
Going to church twice a week is not the answer.
Singing Christian songs and being a good Christian yourself is not the answer.
Those are all tools and can be a wonderful part of the journey and are certainly good....but there is no formula that if you do this then you get perfect kids.

You have GOT to train your kids how to surround themselves with others who will cheer them on in their faith. Friends who will exhort them, love them enough to confront their sin, who will lift them up when they fall.  Will pray for them when they are weak.  Friends who will run the race with them and, in a culture that hates God and all He stands for will cheer,  "Keep Going!"      Friends, WE need friends like this as well.  Don't keep your family or yourself in a "safe" Christian bubble.  That doesn't work.  Our hearts are deceitful the Bible says so our bubble, if left alone, is full of deceit.  We NEED others to encourage us and be there for us.  Make sure that who you pick to surround your family with, your kids with and yourself with are passionate for Jesus too!    It's a race that we are all running together, and we need each other. Everyone who finishes the race WINS. There is no competition.   "Friends" who don't love Jesus and who don't seek Him above all else will only pull you down.

PLEASE make this a priority in your own life, your kids' lives and in your family circles.   THEN you can go out and carry the Good News to others as well.    Choose your partners well that run the race with you. Eternity is counting on it!!!

2 Timothy 4:7 I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.

Hebrews 12:1-2  Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,  looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith,

REST....how to rest in the midst of Life's chaos!

One thing I've been thinking about lately is REST.  That might sound funny as the mom of 10 kids all still at home,  But kinda like JOY that is an inward being regardless of your outward circumstances, it is what you are because of who lives in you (Jesus), Rest can happen despite busyness and chaos.

 It's a contentment in where you are, knowing that life is a journey and resting in God's goodness...trusting that He has you right where you need to be, and being happy with just that.   You don't have to work to make His will happen. You don't have to work to make Him love you more.  You can trust your Daddy God knowing that He has a plan and it will all work for your good.  All He wants us to do is rest in Him.  Trust His plan. Trust His leading in our lives. 

We can't see around the bend, but He can...and He promises to never leave us; He promises that He desires good for us.   So remember when you were a little kid...and if Mommy was there....all was well.    That is how we need to be with God.  He is here and that is all we need to know...so relax.  REST. 

What does that mean practically? 
Worried about a job situation?  Pray and Trust God. Rest.
Worried about if you'll find the love of your life?  Pray and Trust God. Rest.
Worried about a health situation? Pray and Trust God. Rest.
Worried about if you're doing enough in your parenting?  Pray and Trust God. Rest.
Worried about finances?  Pray and Trust God. Rest.
Worried about a relationship problem?  Pray and Trust God. Rest.
Worried about educational challenges?  Pray and Trust God. Rest.

Our church is currently studying Hebrews. If you want to read about God's rest check out ch 3-4.  It talks about the Israelites in the desert and how they didn't enter God's rest because of unbelief.  They always doubted that God would come through for them. Despite freeing them from Egypt, giving them clothing that never wore out, providing daily food and water, they still doubted His promises. 
God is faithful.  He was faithful to the Israelites and He's been faithful in my life and yours. So why do we doubt yet again His faithfulness. REST knowing that your Daddy is in control....He loves you...and it really will be okay. 

Brown Eyes and Blue Skies....and how God answers prayer

There are times that we feel like our prayers are hitting the ceiling and bouncing back.  Or, like an email lost in cyberspace, going into nothingness.   We feel God is silent.   Then there are times where we KNOW that we KNOW that God answered a prayer and heard us. Not coincidence....not chance.   The GOD of the universe, heard our tiny request.....huge to us, but seemingly small to a King that rules the whole world.    It's those moments that we tuck away into our hearts.  It's what fuels our faith for when times seem silent.   

The longer I follow Christ, the more my faith grows.  In the dry times where I may not feel as close to my Father, I know that I still am.   Those times where I may forget and wonder if He hears and cares....I have those times in my history that I can turn back to and know without a doubt he cares about every detail of my life.

Last week our family planned a neighborhood BBQ party.  We had been wanting to get to know our neighbors better, but it has been hard.  So we handed out personal invitations to every one of the 17 homes on our road.   We were hopeful that someone would show up.   Excitedly, we received texts from FIVE homes saying they would love to come!!!  But there was a problem.   The weather forecast said that it would rain all day long on Saturday and especially the evening when the party was planned for. 

On Tuesday, I saw 70% chance of rain. I prayed.  I asked God to please give us good weather for our party.  On Wednesday 76% chance of rain. I asked God again.   Same on Thursday and Friday.  Saturday morning, it still said 70% chance.  It crossed my mind that maybe God wanted the party inside....I knew that God was going to do what was best for us. So we kept our plans and figured we'd all gather inside if need be.    It rained around noon....but by 4pm...and hour before our party, the clouds cleared;  the sun came out.  God overruled the weather forecast and gave me what I requested!!!  The whole party was outside.  The kids played cornhole and volleyball and jumped on the trampoline.   I looked up and saw blue skies.  I had to snap a picture as I smiled at God's goodness.  That He cares about a silly little neighborhood party.

One of my favorite songs says, "God is good, all the time..He put a song of praise in this heart of mine, God is good!"   One thing I want to point out is that even if it had stormed....or a tornado hit during our party...God is good.  He's not good just because He answers our prayers...He just IS GOOD.    He may have answered my prayer with a "no...you need the party inside" and He would still be good.   This week He chose to say "Yes."   God is still good.   I looked up at the sky, snapped this picture and smiled and whispered "Thank you Jesus!"   

I have had many moments over the years where God just did that. He gave me my heart's desire.  One that I'll never forget is almost 20 years ago...finding out that I was pregnant after 2 boys and asking God, "Could we please have a girl? and if it's not asking too much, could she have brown eyes like her daddy?"    A few months later during an ultrasound, I found out our 3rd baby was a girl.  My first though was, "And I bet she'll have brown eyes too."   Sure enough, 5 months later, our baby girl was born with dark brown eyes just like her daddy.  That might just seem coincidental, but out of 10 children only 2 have brown eyes.  We waited 14 years for a 2nd brown eyed little sister.  (See these brown eyes?) 

Remember those times that God answered your seemingly small requests.  Let those give you faith that no matter if He says "Yes" or "No" He hears and He is always answering...and that we see through a glass dimly, and sometimes what we think is best isn't...but He knows and loves us and has a bigger plan for our lives than we can even imagine...and that no matter what the answer is  GOD IS GOOD....ALL THE TIME!!!