A Critical Key to Raising Godly Kids who Don't Drift Away

I've been asked a number of times lately for advice from younger moms on raising kids who don't grow up and drift from the faith.    There is not one magical key to ensuring that this won't happen.
There are some very important key principles for sure; I'll list a few:

• Teach them about Jesus
• Teach them to pray
• Make sure they understand the Gospel... not just as a ticket from hell, but as the Good News that it is....that we have been ransomed/set free from sin and we are no longer slaves to sin or the consequences of it. When a person grasps the depth of their sin and realizes that God has declared them "Not Guilty" they will want to serve and please Him.
• Show them that Christianity is not a set of rules and that legalism is not Christianity.  Christianity is being a Christ follower....a follower of the King of Kings... a privilege and an honor to serve Him.
• That sin separates us from God....whether the sin of pride or disobedience to parents that "good Christian kids" are guilty of, or the sin of adultery, drugs, murder.   Our sins are not "better' than "those people's" sins.  We are all separated from God by our sin and we all desperately need a Savior...that is Jesus!  
• Teach them to love others....your neighbors, the downcast,  the "good" kids and the "bad" kids.  We are all the same---we need Jesus.  
• Model Christianity to your kids. All. The. Time.  Jesus should permeate our lives especially at home. When we mess up, confess and repent.  Show them grace, and love, because Jesus does that to us. 
• Talk about Jesus and the Word of God often....not just once or twice a week but let it be a central part of your lives.  Speak the Word.  Sing praises.  Write verses in your house for all to see and think about.  Read the Bible. Those words are life and truth and are what will get us through the hard times.  

All of the above are great.  They are imperative, necessary for raising kids who love God. But, lately I'm seeing kids who have been raised in a good, godly environment still drift from the faith. I'm seeing a common thread in these sad situations, so I want to warn you.

1 Corinthians 15:33 "Do not be deceived; bad company corrupts good morals." 

Proverbs 13:20 "Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm." 

    

I'm seeing parents that are lax in who they allow their children to be close friends with.  I'm not speaking of keeping our kids apart from everyone that isn't a goody two shoes pastor's kid or missionary kid (and the PK's and MK's everywhere roll their eyes).  I'm not saying your kids can't have casual friends that are not passionate for Jesus. I'm not saying they can't play baseball or soccer.  What I'm warning is that who your children choose as their closest, most intimate friends are who they will become like.   I guarantee you!    If their closest friends have bad attitudes, are disrespectful to their parents, want to spend all their time gaming, don't view Jesus as the best thing that's ever happened to them, love to pursue worldly pleasures, listen to music that sings about things God hates and watches movies that esteem sin, they WILL become like their friends.

Just this month, I've talked to two different Christian homeschooling moms whose kids have drifted into the world because their closest friends do not encourage them in their faith to pursue Jesus with all. 
Homeschooling is not the answer folks.
Going to church twice a week is not the answer.
Singing Christian songs and being a good Christian yourself is not the answer.
Those are all tools and can be a wonderful part of the journey and are certainly good....but there is no formula that if you do this then you get perfect kids.

You have GOT to train your kids how to surround themselves with others who will cheer them on in their faith. Friends who will exhort them, love them enough to confront their sin, who will lift them up when they fall.  Will pray for them when they are weak.  Friends who will run the race with them and, in a culture that hates God and all He stands for will cheer,  "Keep Going!"      Friends, WE need friends like this as well.  Don't keep your family or yourself in a "safe" Christian bubble.  That doesn't work.  Our hearts are deceitful the Bible says so our bubble, if left alone, is full of deceit.  We NEED others to encourage us and be there for us.  Make sure that who you pick to surround your family with, your kids with and yourself with are passionate for Jesus too!    It's a race that we are all running together, and we need each other. Everyone who finishes the race WINS. There is no competition.   "Friends" who don't love Jesus and who don't seek Him above all else will only pull you down.

PLEASE make this a priority in your own life, your kids' lives and in your family circles.   THEN you can go out and carry the Good News to others as well.    Choose your partners well that run the race with you. Eternity is counting on it!!!

2 Timothy 4:7 I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith.

Hebrews 12:1-2  Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,  looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith,

REST....how to rest in the midst of Life's chaos!

One thing I've been thinking about lately is REST.  That might sound funny as the mom of 10 kids all still at home,  But kinda like JOY that is an inward being regardless of your outward circumstances, it is what you are because of who lives in you (Jesus), Rest can happen despite busyness and chaos.

 It's a contentment in where you are, knowing that life is a journey and resting in God's goodness...trusting that He has you right where you need to be, and being happy with just that.   You don't have to work to make His will happen. You don't have to work to make Him love you more.  You can trust your Daddy God knowing that He has a plan and it will all work for your good.  All He wants us to do is rest in Him.  Trust His plan. Trust His leading in our lives. 

We can't see around the bend, but He can...and He promises to never leave us; He promises that He desires good for us.   So remember when you were a little kid...and if Mommy was there....all was well.    That is how we need to be with God.  He is here and that is all we need to know...so relax.  REST. 

What does that mean practically? 
Worried about a job situation?  Pray and Trust God. Rest.
Worried about if you'll find the love of your life?  Pray and Trust God. Rest.
Worried about a health situation? Pray and Trust God. Rest.
Worried about if you're doing enough in your parenting?  Pray and Trust God. Rest.
Worried about finances?  Pray and Trust God. Rest.
Worried about a relationship problem?  Pray and Trust God. Rest.
Worried about educational challenges?  Pray and Trust God. Rest.

Our church is currently studying Hebrews. If you want to read about God's rest check out ch 3-4.  It talks about the Israelites in the desert and how they didn't enter God's rest because of unbelief.  They always doubted that God would come through for them. Despite freeing them from Egypt, giving them clothing that never wore out, providing daily food and water, they still doubted His promises. 
God is faithful.  He was faithful to the Israelites and He's been faithful in my life and yours. So why do we doubt yet again His faithfulness. REST knowing that your Daddy is in control....He loves you...and it really will be okay. 

Brown Eyes and Blue Skies....and how God answers prayer

There are times that we feel like our prayers are hitting the ceiling and bouncing back.  Or, like an email lost in cyberspace, going into nothingness.   We feel God is silent.   Then there are times where we KNOW that we KNOW that God answered a prayer and heard us. Not coincidence....not chance.   The GOD of the universe, heard our tiny request.....huge to us, but seemingly small to a King that rules the whole world.    It's those moments that we tuck away into our hearts.  It's what fuels our faith for when times seem silent.   

The longer I follow Christ, the more my faith grows.  In the dry times where I may not feel as close to my Father, I know that I still am.   Those times where I may forget and wonder if He hears and cares....I have those times in my history that I can turn back to and know without a doubt he cares about every detail of my life.

Last week our family planned a neighborhood BBQ party.  We had been wanting to get to know our neighbors better, but it has been hard.  So we handed out personal invitations to every one of the 17 homes on our road.   We were hopeful that someone would show up.   Excitedly, we received texts from FIVE homes saying they would love to come!!!  But there was a problem.   The weather forecast said that it would rain all day long on Saturday and especially the evening when the party was planned for. 

On Tuesday, I saw 70% chance of rain. I prayed.  I asked God to please give us good weather for our party.  On Wednesday 76% chance of rain. I asked God again.   Same on Thursday and Friday.  Saturday morning, it still said 70% chance.  It crossed my mind that maybe God wanted the party inside....I knew that God was going to do what was best for us. So we kept our plans and figured we'd all gather inside if need be.    It rained around noon....but by 4pm...and hour before our party, the clouds cleared;  the sun came out.  God overruled the weather forecast and gave me what I requested!!!  The whole party was outside.  The kids played cornhole and volleyball and jumped on the trampoline.   I looked up and saw blue skies.  I had to snap a picture as I smiled at God's goodness.  That He cares about a silly little neighborhood party.

One of my favorite songs says, "God is good, all the time..He put a song of praise in this heart of mine, God is good!"   One thing I want to point out is that even if it had stormed....or a tornado hit during our party...God is good.  He's not good just because He answers our prayers...He just IS GOOD.    He may have answered my prayer with a "no...you need the party inside" and He would still be good.   This week He chose to say "Yes."   God is still good.   I looked up at the sky, snapped this picture and smiled and whispered "Thank you Jesus!"   

I have had many moments over the years where God just did that. He gave me my heart's desire.  One that I'll never forget is almost 20 years ago...finding out that I was pregnant after 2 boys and asking God, "Could we please have a girl? and if it's not asking too much, could she have brown eyes like her daddy?"    A few months later during an ultrasound, I found out our 3rd baby was a girl.  My first though was, "And I bet she'll have brown eyes too."   Sure enough, 5 months later, our baby girl was born with dark brown eyes just like her daddy.  That might just seem coincidental, but out of 10 children only 2 have brown eyes.  We waited 14 years for a 2nd brown eyed little sister.  (See these brown eyes?) 

Remember those times that God answered your seemingly small requests.  Let those give you faith that no matter if He says "Yes" or "No" He hears and He is always answering...and that we see through a glass dimly, and sometimes what we think is best isn't...but He knows and loves us and has a bigger plan for our lives than we can even imagine...and that no matter what the answer is  GOD IS GOOD....ALL THE TIME!!!

Have you Taught your Kids to Sell on Ebay?

As parents know, learning does not just take place inside the school room or inside their workbooks.  Actually, quite the opposite. I believe that LASTING learning often happens during real-life.   I could list hundreds of ways to incorporate life into your learning, but one I wanted to point out today is Ebay.  I have been selling on ebay since 1999 after a friend introduced me to it.  I started before I even owned a digital camera...that's a long time ago.

If you haven't yet learned to sell on ebay, I highly recommend it!!  It's simple to learn, and once you do, you will likely be hooked,  and then you can teach your own kids!!

This post is not a "how to" but an overview on WHY selling on ebay is great to incorporate into your kids' lives.

Here are a few good reasons:

• Many kids get into the habit of spending.  Selling and making money can be just as fun, and it is a much better habit to learn to think like an entrepreneur.  Looking for nice quality or highly desired items that they could purchase to resell.
• It will help them declutter.  When they see that the toy or clothing that is sitting there unused and can be turned into cash, it motivates you to declutter!
• It teaches them a skill they can be proud of.
• Often people want to sell things on ebay but they don't want to learn. We have had dozens of people ask us to sell their junk on ebay for a 50% or so commission.  That translates into a nice little work from home job for kids.  No age requirement necessary.  (I have kids as young as 12 that have mastered ebay and do fantastic!!)  
• It teaches them how to type and describe items and type sentences.  Language Arts right there!!
• It teaches them math.  They get to calculate postal rates, sales and fees on paypal and ebay.  They can do it on paper or learn a system like Excel if you want to deepen the education. 
• They become familiar with how to package boxes/envelopes. How to calculate shipping rates.  Learning how to track packages to make sure they arrived. 
• They learn to deal with people.  Most transactions are smooth and easy but occasionally you'll get a picky buyer who finds SOMETHING to complain about.  Voila...people skills right there...learning how to keep customers happy.  
• Digital Photography.  A picture is worth a thousand words...learning to take a good picture so buyers can see exactly what they are bidding on.  It's not hard but most kids haven't learned that yet.   Also editing photos, rotating pictures, cropping etc. 
• Finding out what something is worth.  It's important to do quick research on completed items to see beforehand if it's even worth your time to sell that item.  This comes in VERY handy when you're at the clearance section at Walmart,  or at Goodwill or a yard sale to check right then to see if it's worth your time to sell.   Sometimes you see that it isn't but often you'll see that this $2 item sells for $30 on ebay!  Or this $20 Lego set will sell for $60 online.  Grab it!  
• patience...sometimes you can sell something quickly for cheap, but if you stay patient and stick to your price, if reasonable, you'll make more money if you just keep it on ebay and wait for the right buyer.
• One year, when my older kids were younger, we tracked packages as part of geography.  We would mark on a map where each item sold and put a mark on the map to show all our sales that year geographically.  
• Most shipping labels are printed at home and the package can be thrown in the mailbox.  Sometimes it's too large or you have too many packages to fit in your mailbox so it requires a trip to the post office.  This is good for social skills--- having them take the package(s) into the post office and handle the transaction.     When my oldest son was 4, he was able to do this. (It was a small town and I could see the door of the post office and knew the postal lady)  Since the label is all ready, he just had to wait in line and hand it to the postal worker.  You may want your kids to be older if you live in a larger town and can't see inside clearly. 
• With the money they will make, they can open a savings account and learn banking.
• If you believe in tithing, that is another good part of earning money is giving some away to the church or a ministry that they feel passionate about.     Raising money for a missions project is another good reason for kids to learn to make money.  

So there you have it! I'm sure there are even more reasons why selling on Ebay is a good idea to teach your kids.  What other ideas do you have?

"Remember to be Jesus!"

I was grabbing my purse and heading out the door, and I heard the familiar voice that I hear when anyone in our family heads out into the world......

REMEMBER TO BE JESUS!!!!

One of my younger children never fails to remind us parents and older kids of this when we are leaving on an errand.   I can't tell you how much this helps and impacts me.   I get my mind so set on conquering my Walmart shopping list, post office trip, or gymnastics run that I sometimes forget the most important thing. 

Last week, I heard these words again.  But I don't take it lightly or brush it off.  I was getting out of my car with my 10 year old, and as I'm walking into Walmart I hear her voice from home ringing in my head, "Remember to be Jesus!"   I smiled at an elderly African-American lady, and she smiled back.   

A few minutes later, the Walmart greeter was sitting on his stool with a sad look on his face.   "Good morning! How are you?" I said with a smile, again hearing in my head, "Remember to be Jesus!!"   

A little later, on the other side of the store, someone was blocking the aisle for quite a while without realizing it.  I was in a hurry, but the voice in my head reminded me...and I took a deep breath and when she said, "Oh I'm sorry," I patiently replied.  "Oh that's okay, no problem," and meant it.  "Remember to be Jesus." 

This post has nothing to do with me being kind that day.  Because without that reminder I may have done none of those things. I may have tuned into my grocery list and gone about my trip accomplishing what I came to do...fill up the cart, cross the items off, and head home.   But this child of mine, reminded me that we are called to be so much more.  We are God's representative to a lost and sad world of His goodness.  We are ambassadors, witnesses.  We have love and joy in our hearts because we have HIM in our hearts..and HE is love and joy. 

I recently asked her where she got the idea and she said that it was her older brother. YES! Of course!  My oldest son has said the same thing for years as well...but he's been gone a lot so I had forgotten.  By his example she has picked up the mantle of godly reminding us of our calling and destiny as Christians. 

Let me encourage you so you can encourage another Christian and remind me and everyone around you.  Don't lose focus.  Don't forget the purpose.   

When you are running to Walmart....

REMEMBER TO BE JESUS!!!!

When you are running to the post office....

REMEMBER TO BE JESUS!!!!

When you are taking your kids to gymnastics, soccer or baseball....
REMEMBER TO BE JESUS!!!!

When you are being a wife, a mom, or a friend...REMEMBER TO BE JESUS!!!!

Early Elementary Language Arts Homeschool Curriculum through 3rd Grade

In my last post, I talked about math curriculum.  This post will discuss some curriculum that I use or have used for Early Elementary:  roughly preschool through 3rd grade for handwriting and language arts. 

I love teaching these grades because everything is new and exciting! I love to see light bulbs go off as they "get it."  I love to see their reading slowly improve until by 4th grade they read to themselves.

There is a lot of great curriculum out there for these early years.  I wish I had time to use more than I do.  I will caution you that there is also a lot of curriculum out there that is terrible for little people.  Curriculum that brings tears and squelches any love for learning that could be ignited in these precious, early years.   I won't name specifics, but steer clear of curriculum that brings tears. That causes small kids to "do school" past lunchtime. (that doesn't include the more fun hands-on stuff, or reading out loud, just any book-work type stuff.)  If their face looks like this you may want to re-think what you're doing.     

In my experience, actual sit down and do workbooks at this stage should be limited to no more than 1-2 hours.  Less (much less) for kindergarten.  Add a lot of reading out loud, fun hands on learning outside or in the kitchen, and let them guide you as to what they love and have a desire to learn as well.

For Handwriting, I have 2 that I like a lot:

• Handwriting Without Tears
• The Good and the Beautiful Handwriting

I'm currently using TGTB because I like that they build art into the curriculum, but if you have a child that doesn't enjoy art, then HWT might be a better choice.   Another good option is A Reason for Handwriting, especially for girls that like to color and send letters in the mail. 

Spelling:  Fun Fact:  I never teach spelling with a formal curriculum in the K-3rd grade range.  You can waste a lot of time teaching them to spell words that if you wait until their reading gets better, they will just KNOW how to spell....so trust me on this one....hold off on spelling until later!!

Phonics/Learning to Read:
In Preschool, I typically like to "do school" as they ask to be like the "big kids." 
Some books that I've used and really like are:

• Horizons Preschool book 1 (only) *book 2 has too much writing for this age IMO so I don't buy it.  
• My First School Book (Handwriting without Tears)
• Explode the Code Primers: Get Ready Get Set Go for the Code
• Horizons Math K
• Sonlight Preschool Read Alouds  (I bought most of these books when my oldest kids were in preschool....you can, honestly, just get any great books and read aloud to them from the library...just be sure to include Bible, and a variety of books like fiction, science, social studies etc--this is usually their favorite time of the day).

Kindergarten Language Arts: 
**Treasure is starting Kindergarten in the fall and this is what she is currently working on**

• The Good and the Beautiful Handwriting (Link above)
• Explode the code books 1-3
• Learning Language Arts Through Literature Blue Book  (I have used this since 1998. It is just FUN.  Lots of hands on things.  Lot of tiny books they can start reading on their own right from the bat just like Bob Books).   I enjoy teaching it and they enjoy learning to read with it.   It does have handwriting built in, but I don't care for their style (Italic Handwriting) so we do skip that portion of it.   

1st Grade Language Arts:

• Explode the Code (roughly books 4-6...but honestly some kids go faster and some slower so I do books 1-7 total at their pace until they are done, usually by the end of 2nd grade.)
• Learning Language Arts Through Literature Red Book (This is a continuation of the Blue book...by the time they are done with the Red, they are pretty great readers)
• Abeka Language 1  (Okay, I'm honestly NOT an Abeka fan at all...but I do love their Language 1,2,3 workbooks...they are short, to the point and just work to reinforce what this age group needs..after 3rd grade though, I'm really really not a fan of their language arts)
• Good and the Beautiful Handwriting 1 

2nd Grade Language Arts:

• Explode the Code book 7 (or finish wherever they left off in 1st grade)
• Abeka Language 2
• Sonlight 2 Readers (Read out loud to me all the 2nd grade readers starting with the Beginners Bible)
• Good and the Beautiful Handwriting 2

3rd Grade Language Arts:
**This is Ransom's lineup for next year Language Arts**

• Good and the Beautiful Handwriting 3
• Abeka Language 3
• Sonlight 3 Readers (Reading out loud and transitioning to reading independently when they are pretty fluent readers...usually halfway through this year)
• Language Lessons for a Living Education book 3 (which replaces Explode the Code from last year) 

One other thing that I have seen good results with is the website Starfall.com   We use the free version, and they like to "play" with it in their free time.  My 6th child loved it so much, she accidentally taught herself to read on her own.  

Another one some of my kids have enjoyed for reading is:  https://www.teachyourmonstertoread.com/

To answer a few questions:

**I really don't teach spelling at these ages**

**It might seem weird to have more than one Language Arts curriculum most years.  I really like these combinations..and I feel the most important thing academically to accomplish in these early years is to create good readers.  To make them fluent and to enjoy reading as well.  So we focus pretty heavily on Language Arts in the first few years.  That said, our school is not long and tedious.  Most of these books can be accomplished in under 15 minutes each. We devote the most time to out loud reading from real (good)books, and not boring curriculum readers....and they all have seemed to enjoy snuggling on the couch and reading a good book to me.**

**I think reading aloud to your kids is very important.  I try to do this when I can, and I typically choose good books from our home library.  If you need some ideas, check out the catalogs from curriculum like Sonlight,  Heart of Dakota  or My Father's World.  They all have great selections of good literature ideas. 

I firmly believe that Christians need to be some of the best communicators both with written and oral communication.  How else can we share the Good News of Jesus?   In our homeschool, we tend to make Language Arts a priority for that reason.  

Homeschool Curriculum Review: Math

Hi Fellow Homeschoolers!
I was recently asked to discuss what we are currently using and loving for our homeschool curriculum.   I thought I'd start with math....cause math is just wonderful.  =) 

 Over the last 20+ years that I've been perusing and using homeschool curriculum, I've tried MANY different math curricula.
The list that we have tried at one time or another is extensive:

• Singapore Math
• Abeka Math
• Horizons Math
• Teaching Textbooks 
• Math Lessons for a Living Education 
• Mathematical Reasoning (Critical Thinking Press)
• ALEKS
• Life of Fred
• Principles of Mathematics (Master Books) 
• Math-U-See

And many I've looked at and decided wasn't a good fit for our family...which includes practically all that wasn't mentioned above.  (I'm a curriculum junkie!)  =)
Sometimes a great curriculum for one student is just not a great fit for the next so I've had to ditch a great curriculum for a time to fit a different learning style. (One of the biggest reasons I LOVE homeschooling!!)

Our current math that is working the best for us in this season is:

Pre-K: Horizons Math K
Kindergarten: Horizons Math 1
1st: Horizons Math 2

2nd: Math Lessons for a Living Education 3
3rd: Math Lessons for a Living Education 4
4th: Math Lessons for a Living Education 5
5th: Math Lessons for a Living Education 6

6th: Principles of Mathematics 1
7th: Principles of Mathematics 2

8th: Teaching Textbooks Algebra 1
9th: Teaching Textbooks Geometry
10th: Teaching Textbooks Algebra 2
11th: Dual Credit Math: Either College Algebra or College Mathematics depending on the student

12th: Math U See Stewardship (to make sure all the practical math has been covered for life--I just have them read through it and do any problems they aren't knowledgeable about)

Let me explain a few things that I can already hear questions about.

**I've found that all of my 4 year olds have been ready for kindergarten math and excited to start school to be like the big kids. So we usually finish kindergarten math a year early.

**I really love Math Lessons for a Living Education (MLFLE)  but not levels 1-2. I felt like it was too much writing/copywork for kids too young to have great fine motor skills....so we use Horizons through 2nd grade. Which is perfect because starting in grade 3, I feel like Horizons uses "drill and kill."  Way too many problems to easily overwhelm the average 8 year old.

**MLFLE and Principles of Mathematics are both published by Master books so they flow well into each other

**Overall I love Teaching Textbooks for High school.  It has a lot of repetition and explains concepts sometimes overboard. Each problem is worked out entirely so students are easily able to do this on their own.   On the flip side, Teaching Textbooks can be very frustrating for a student that is a natural at math and loves it.  They explain and re explain. Most kids love that. My student who is a very fast learner at math did not like that at all.

**If a student just loves higher math and/or wants to go into a STEM field that requires Calculus, I honestly feel that Life of Fred is the most rigorous and best preparation for math nerds.   It goes way deeper and wider than pretty much any other math out there. It explains so much of WHY something is done that math nerds relish!  So for that kind of student, I would start Fred in Pre Algebra or Beginning Algebra.

**While I love the Life of Fred Elementary, for us it wasn't enough work as a stand alone curriculum until about 5th grade. It's plenty enough starting at 5th grade and do recommend it for advanced kids around that age as a great option.

So that is what is currently working in our school right now.  There is not really a wrong choice though. If what you are using is working and not causing stress or tears in you or your kids, then stick with it!!!  If math is stressful or brings tears, then I'd recommend switching curriculum even if you are only a month into it.   We had to do that when we tried Abeka....it's just too much "drill and kill."   We want math to be fun (as much as possible anyway).   What works for 1 or 2 students might not work for a houseful of students and vice versa.  You know your children's learning style, how you like to teach, and what season you're in. Nobody is better at making curriculum decisions for your family than YOU are!  So don't feel you need to fit into anybody's mold.  I'm only sharing what is currently working with us to give people ideas.  Happy Homeschooling!

Teach Them Diligently Opryland Homeschool Convention

I had the opportunity to go to the Teach Them Diligently Homeschool convention again this year in Nashville at Opryland.  My husband and I enjoy going and always come away encouraged.  This year we also brought our daughters and a friend.       If you homeschool and have not been to a convention, I highly recommend Teach Them Diligently!!!!

The highlight for me is always the exhibit hall.  There is nothing like the biggest room you've ever seen full of exciting books that interest you.  It makes my heart race a little just thinking about it. Perusing the books and curriculum is always great to get ideas from and make decisions for curriculum for the new school year.   

This year, I took time out to go to 3 sessions as well.  To give you an idea of what the convention is like....at any given moment you can choose from TWENTY possible sessions to attend that are going on simultaneously all over the Opryland Convention Center.  Every hour there are 20 NEW sessions.  Whew. 

This year, I went to a session by Kevin Sorbo, Hollywood actor (Hercules/God's Not Dead), director, producer.   His talk was called "Fame, Family and Faith." He talked about the costs of being vocal in his faith in the secular world of Hollywood.  He is a very outspoken Christian and homeschool dad of 3 as well. 

The next session was by Ann Dunagan titled, "Training Girls to be Mission-Minded Women."  She encouraged homescoolers to not just let their girls sit like pretty princesses but to be warriors for Christ....reaching a lost world and focusing on the women, children, orphans and other needs that women tend to have more of a heart for than men do.  Their family has visited 116 countries with the gospel...so they are living what she teaches.  She gave a lot of examples of how they have incorporated their entire family in missions/evangelism/church planting.   

The 3rd session was by Israel Wayne entitled, "How not to Educate (like a heathen)."  He explained the Biblical view of education vs the cultural view. He showed that we need a family mission statement.  His is, "Know, love and serve God and to love and serve others."  He says every area of our lives need to be focused on this one mission.  Education is no exception.   He described our life as a piece of pie.  As Christians, our spiritual life is the foundation of the whole pie.   When we "cut" into our life, pieces like education, money, friends, entertainment etc...should all point towards God and our mission as a Christian.  Just like a blueberry pie...every piece is full of blueberries, so every area of our lives should reflect Christ. 

He also talked about how far from Christian roots American education has moved.  He showed a Harvard College Mission statement from 1636.  Wow..has it changed a lot!!!

I wish I had time to go to more sessions. Every one impacted me in a new way!

Thankful for this time to be encouraged to press on, to re-align my goals again and to be excited for a new homeschool year coming up!  

Deuteronomy 10:12-13 

 “And now, Israel, what does the Lord your God require of you, but to fear the Lord your God, to walk in all His ways and to love Him, to serve the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul, and to keep the commandments of the Lord and His statutes which I command you today for your good?"

You really CAN stop YELLING at your kids!

I recently posted about being a THANKFUL mother and a JOYFUL mother. Well, today, I want to talk about being a PEACEFUL mother to your children.   I was recently out shopping and saw a mother yell at her preschool aged child, belittle him, and speak hurtful words to him. I admit that the child was not being obedient, but that is the MOTHER'S fault for not properly training. (That is for another post.)    This always makes me feel so sad.  The children paying the consequences for their mother's lack of self control, joy, and lack of training.    If you have a habit of yelling at your kids and losing your temper, and you call yourself a Christ-follower, then this post is for you.  

This post will not apply if you haven't made a decision to follow Christ in your life and, by faith, live out  your Christianity by following God's Word. With that disclaimer, I want to look at a few verses of what it means to be a follower of Christ:

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires. 

- James 1:19-20



Fools give full vent to their rage,
but the wise bring calm in the end.
- Proverbs 29:11



Do not hasten in your spirit to be angry,
For anger rests in the bosom of fools.

- Ecclesiastes 7:9



A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word
stirs up anger.

- Proverbs 15:1



Make no friendship with an angry man,
And with a furious man do not go,
Lest you learn his ways
And set a snare for your soul.
- Proverbs 22:24-25

Whoever is patient has great understanding, but one 

who is quick-tempered displays folly.

- Proverbs 14:29

I think it's pretty clear that God doesn't want us to be full of anger, rage, and yelling. A few weeks ago, I shared Philippians 2 that tells us that "a servant of the Lord must not argue...but be gentle to all."

This is not just a bad habit, friend, this is a sin issue. The Bible is pretty clear.

I hear a lot of parents with lots of excuses. "I can't help it." "I probably need to work on that problem." etc. That is the bad news....you have something that needs to be fixed. But God doesn't just throw condemnation at us....He gives us EVERYTHING WE NEED to live a godly life. He doesn't just tell us "don't yell at your kids anymore," He gives us the tools we need to walk that out in real life. That is GOOD NEWS!!!!

This is the exciting part!!!! This one tidbit can transform so many aspects of your life!!! Being a Christian, the Holy Spirit lives inside of us! That is the first and most important bit of good news. But unless you understand how exciting that is, it won't matter in your life. BECAUSE He lives inside of us, we have HIS fruit at our disposal. It is OURS too! Galatians 5:22-23 says:

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control."

Isn't that awesome fruit? Let's read this in light of yelling at your kids. Yelling is not loving, joyful, long-suffering. It's not kind, good, gentle and it surely doesn't show self-control! But when we parent on our own strength and flesh... that is the result we get. But when we parent with the Holy Spirit's power...we CAN have self-control... and be loving, joyful and gentle. You just need to, by faith, choose to parent in the Spirit's power and not your flesh. You really CAN stop yelling. You can choose to parent in God's strength... and stop yelling from now on! Isn't that exciting? You aren't powerless. In your own strength, yes you are, but you have God living IN YOU. And that is awesome news!!!!!

My "Self-Cleaning" Kitchen. Well, sorta.

Having a large family takes a bit of organization.  I have many aspects of our home that I still haven't figured out how to run smoothly, unfortunately.  It flows...just not always as seamlessly as I'd like.
I DO feel that our kitchen system works well, so I thought I'd share that with you.   This system would work with any sized family....you would just need to tweak it for the jobs and number of children that you'd like to be involved in the process.


Here are some facts about the Konsavage Kitchen clean-up crew:

• All ages help out, but they are typically included in chore rotation at 6 years old. A 6 year old is capable of most chores in our kitchen.  
• We currently have 6 kids in kitchen rotation with 6 different jobs for 6 days of the week.
• Each kid does one job one day per week all day. 

You might feel that a 6 year old is not capable of washing dishes, putting away dishes, or putting away leftovers.  Let me assure you, with training, they are wonderful at these jobs!!

Our 6 kitchen chores/jobs include:

             washing dishes & loading dishwasher    
                 

emptying dishwasher and dish drainer/drying wet dishes

sweeping floor

  

wiping down table and 

putting napkins in dirty napkin bucket

clean counters and put away leftovers

cook/or help mom to cook

😊😊😊😊

Here is a picture of our kitchen chore schedule.  Notice it is written in pencil because sometimes an older brother is at college or working away from home and a younger sibling will take his place.  When they are home from college/work, they assist the smallest helper who was their replacement.

So that sums it up!  There are many ways to run a kitchen. This is just ONE way. It works for us.

Are you a THANKFUL Mother of children?

A few weeks ago, when we talked about the subject of being bored, I touched on the importance of teaching our children to not complain.  I wanted to expound on that a bit more because this ONE concept, if you really work on it in your family, will transform the whole environment of your home! 

A verse that is one of my favorites and one I have repeated often is found in Philippians 2:14:

"Do ALL THINGS without complaining and disputing..."

She's complaining about SOMETHING.
 I just don't know what. 

Did you catch that?  ALL THINGS!   That doesn't leave a lot of room open for griping does it?   WHEW. This is a tough one.  A number of years ago, this was the theme that God was working on in our family.   Focusing on complaining....and beginning to notice it....in myself as much as the kids, it really started to be a "thing" that I realized we needed to work on.     As a family we really tried to catch it and focus more on thankfulness.   With practice we got better!   We are by no means complain-free.  In fact, I still catch myself often thinking or saying something and immediately catching myself, but when you become aware of your complaining, you can start to change not only the words that come out of your mouth, but also the thoughts that float through your brain.  Because, EVERYTHING we say, starts in our brain!!!

This passage is SO COOL though.  Let's keep reading verses 14-16:

Do all things without complaining and disputing,  that you may become blameless and harmless, children of God without fault in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world,  holding fast the word of life, so that I may rejoice in the day of Christ that I have not run in vain or labored in vain.

Mini sermon time...it says that by being people who don't complain, we actually "shine as lights in the world" in a "crooked and perverse generation."  What an impact and a difference we can make as Christians by simply "doing all things without complaining."   That is profound!!!

So, when you catch yourself (or your kids) complaining:

"I hate winter; I can't wait until spring!"

"I thought this was supposed to be FAST food...they are taking FOREVER."

"The music was too loud/too soft at church."

"So and so drives me crazy!" 

"This food is nasty!"

"I'm so sick of doing laundry."

I challenge you to catch yourself.  Bite your tongue and instead think of something you can be thankful for in this situation! Eventually, you will develop a habit of not complaining and instead being more thankful.   I encourage you to talk to your kids about it.  Make it into a game of "catching" complaints and pointing them out to each other...or seeing who can be the most thankful instead.    

Here is a fun song to watch with your kids. Steve Green's "Without Complaining."  

  

Are you a "JOYFUL Mother of children"?

I recently came across this verse again from Psalm 113:9:

He makes the barren woman abide in the house As a joyful mother of children. Praise the Lord!

It got me thinking about the phrase "joyful mother."  What a wonderful thing!  Doesn't it just make you think of a happy housewife running around her home with a smile and smiling children all around... a clean kitchen... no toys on the floor... and the aroma of fresh baked delicacies?  I admit, that's my first thought.  But when I think more about it...of course, that's not reality.  Maybe in "Leave it to Beaver," but not in the real world.

Putting that verse in the real world...my real world, I totally understand what it means and what God is trying to show us.

God has not created the institute of family and motherhood to be full of anxiety, frustration, burdens and shackles.  He created us to be a JOYFUL mother of children!!  (And if any dads are reading this too, just insert "Joyful father of children!")

What exactly does it mean to be "joyful?"  It's not jumping up and down with excitement and having feelings of ecstasy all day long.  Cause, let's face it, last week when TWELVE of us got stomach bug (and let me remind you that there are only 13 stomachs residing in our whole house and one of them is my pet fish named George--and even HE looked queasy last week) I wasn't feeling like jumping up and down cause I loved motherhood so much.  😳   

To me, being joyful as a mother is being content and having a peace in my heart that I am exactly where I need to be, doing the most important job in the universe: caring and loving children that God has given me as gifts.  It is KNOWING who you are as a mother... that your job matters... that you are changing lives and making a difference in the world as you raise future leaders and world-changers who will go out and bless and impact the world for Christ. 

That, ladies, is our job description as mothers.  Pretty cool huh?

Our culture will tell you that "just staying home" is not impressive at all. That you are "just a housewife."  Isn't that sad?  I have to remind you that our culture does not value what God values.  And if you are a working mom, don't let them tell you that that job is more important than being a mom to your children. Some women need to work, but don't believe for one minute that your mom job is not as important.  It is one billion times more important!!!  Nobody can love and be a joyful mother to YOUR children the way you can.  There is no substitute!!!

So, if your first thought of motherhood is just feeling overwhelmed with laundry, cooking, snotty noses, crying and tantrums (you and the kids), spit up on your clothes and dirty diapers, then I encourage you to view motherhood through God's eyes. The Bible is TRUTH, and anything else you might feel or believe different are lies... so listen to the voice of truth! (You'll be glad you did.)
Joy is a fruit of the Spirit.  It can only come from God.  Sure you might feel moments of being happy without God, but you won't know true JOY unless the Holy Spirit of God lives in you.   So that is the first step.

2 Peter 1:3 tells us that God has given us EVERYTHING we need to live a godly life.   A godly life includes joy!!!  So if you are mothering in your own strength, barely surviving....trying your best to put on a fake smile and not yell... it won't work.  At least not for long.  You need to by faith, read what the Bible says about motherhood, children and joy and begin to walk in it with the joy of the Lord as your strength... not coffee... or "me" time... or escaping to social media...

You, my friend, can find amazing joy in the midst of dishes, laundry, crying, and cooking because of WHO lives in you and is helping you to do everything that He has called you to do.  With Him, you CAN be a joyful mother of children!!!!

I truly LOVE my job.   I gave up a pretty good paycheck and career 23 years ago for my current job.  I admit, at first it was a VERY hard adjustment for me.  But God has taught me what a privilege and honor it is to do the job He has given me to do--caring and raising and loving 10 beautiful souls for His glory!!   I can't imagine a job that would bring me more joy and contentment.

If you would like that in your life, whether you are a stay at home mom or a working mom, pray and ask God to give you a vision for how He views children and motherhood. When you catch a glimpse that the King of Kings thinks that your job is super important and that you are the absolutely most qualified person for the job of raising your kids, you will have to smile at the prestigious position you have been given.

It won't always be fun.  It won't (for sure!) be easy. But it will make an impact for eternity and affect generations to come.  I give you permission to tell culture to take a hike.  YOU can be a JOYFUL mother of your children.  You can smile and enjoy your kids. You can LOVE being a mom even if at the moment you don't like the current task at hand.  You can have that inward contentment and peace in your heart that only God can give... so go on!

Be JOYFUL!!!!!!